Mark Davis

Recent evidence provided by the U.S. government has confirmed, at least for me, what many of us have thought: We are not alone.

When I was a kid, it was all about Unidentified Flying Objects — UFOs. I’ve learned recently that the correct acronym is now UAP — Unidentified Aerial Phenomena.

I’ve never seen what I thought might be a flying saucer. I don’t believe I have any friends who have seen one. And I doubt I’ll ever be chosen for further study by beings from outside our solar system.

That’s OK with me. Being probed in outer-space probably wouldn’t rank among my list of favorite past-times.

So when I was approached and asked to check out the latest details of all the recent UAP incidents across North America on the new citizen science website, Enigma Labs, I wasn’t overly motivated to look it up. They were selling it pretty hard, claiming “Wyomingites are obsessed with UFOs.”

They claimed in one of the hundreds of press releases I get weekly from myriad sources, that 61 in every 1,000 Wyoming residents Googled “UFOs” over the past year. It’s the second highest rate of any state, based on online analytics. Only Vermont, with one more search per thousand, beat out residents of the Cowboy State and their obsession with the heavens above. Must be the maple syrup in their diets.

It’s not a mystery why there has been a rash of searches here in Wyoming.

“There have been several reports of inexplicable lights in the night sky across the Mountain West region this year, on top of the four widely covered unidentified aerial phenomena reports that started with the Chinese spy balloon that was shot down in February,” said an Enigma Labs spokesperson.

More than 350 new UAP sightings have been added to US government records since March 2021, the company reports.

“Enigma Labs is creating a platform that anyone can use to report and verify the evidence of UAP sightings. The website allows users to upload photos, videos, descriptions, and geolocational data of their sightings,” according to the company, with the goal of creating a space used for “rational and data-driven discussions” about UAPs that researchers can use to begin understanding these phenomena.

Honestly, it’s hard to surprise me these days. While I doubt there are yeti or sasquatch running around in the Greater Yellowstone Ecosystem — or anywhere else for that matter — I wouldn’t be overly surprised to see a legitimate interview with Larry the abominable snowman before I turn to ashes.

Don’t take from that statement that I think aliens from outer-space are some urban legend or a completely crazy supposition. I believe quite the opposite, actually.

The list of things we know about in our world grows daily. One of these days we’ll all be introduced to Barry the alien live on Dr. Phil.

I doubt I’ll get first crack at asking questions, but if I did get an invitation to interview Barry, one of my first questions would be one of cultural significance.

“What kind of beer do you guys have?” would be my first question.

I don’t drink a lot, but when I consume beer I want it to be the best beer available. I’ve had beer in 44 states and 17 countries over the past several decades. We won’t discuss the actual number of years due to an accurate answer possibly suggesting quite a bit of incriminating evidence.

I don’t want to over-indulge in stating the significance of beer on planet earth, but there’s ample evidence suggesting it’s importance through the millennia. The first solid proof of beer production comes from the period of the Sumerians around 4000 BCE. They called it “the divine drink” because of its intoxicating effect. The earliest known alcoholic beverage may have been brewed around 7000 BCE in China in the village of Jiahu.

People are pretty impressed with cellphones these days. I got my first in 1996. They are pretty cool, but let’s see where they are in another 6,200 years — the amount of time beer has been available on our tiny green planet.

My point is only that beer has been time tested and is still here, getting tastier with every glass filled with specialty crops refined by passionate brewers.

The point being, if Barry the alien could share a secret recipe from his planet that could take brewing to the next plateau, I’d like to be the first to know. I don’t brew beer myself, but I would definitely share the recipe with WYOld West’s Steve Samuelson, the best brewer in these parts in my humble opinion.

Conservative estimates assert that the observable universe may contain as many as 5,300,000,000,000 habitable worlds. That’s 5.3 trillion planets that might contain some form of life. At least one of them must have a brew at least as good as Hamm’s. And possibly even one brewer, who hopefully has the diligence necessary to perfect delivery times within my short stay here on our watery marble, that may compete with Kilted Cowboy. Though I doubt there will ever be a better model than Tyler Evans, who posed in a pleated, plaid kilt for the first can to come from the Powell brewery.

The planet Kepler 186f is supposedly a good choice for earthlings — once we completely screw up earth. Unfortunately, it’s about 500 light years away and could take hundreds of thousands of years to reach.

Who’s to say there’s not a pub there already? Let’s hope they — whoever or whatever they might be — make a low-carb beer that doesn’t taste of bison whiz. And that they have a better delivery service than here in western Wyoming.

It would be just my luck to finally receive my case of cold Kepler 186f brew (pretty sure the “f” is for fermentation) just after the “best served by” date.