Trena Eiden

This is the time to look back and see if we’ve learned anything in the past year. Our oldest son has a saying, “When you look back, glance, don’t stare.” These are true words of wisdom for Gar, who tries hard not to think of the many years he’s endured me. He says he takes advice from something he read. “My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don’t try to run her life…and I don’t try to run mine.”  

Gar works for Samaritan’s Purse and last fall their “Operation Christmas Child” division was hiring leadership development managers in several states, including Wyoming. Gar asked if I’d be interested. I read through the material, but shook my head. “It sounds fun, but I can’t apply. If the lack of a bachelor’s degree wasn’t enough, they request applicants have an optimistic outlook and a positive attitude.” I glanced over at him, “Do you think they meant every day?”  

I’ve learned why we need proofreaders. A couple delivered their baby in a McDonald’s bathroom and when the reporter typed it, I don’t think it was communicated with total accuracy. According to the story, the dad said, “She was on the toilet screaming and I was trying to calm her down by saying to just breathe. The ladies at McDonald’s were at her side holding her hands, then I got her on the floor and I took off my clothes.” While I hesitate to judge because well, obviously I wasn’t there, I’m fairly certain if he’d taken off his clothes instead of hers, someone would have called the authorities.  

This week I was intrigued by a Chinese businessman who snapped a photo of youngsters in coats and snow boots crawling on top of a car. He stated that he believes children being happy is the most valuable thing in the world. The man allowed the kids to jump and play on a Lamborghini, and the best part … the kids weren’t his, but then neither was the Lamborghini.  

Maybe I should work harder at being a better spouse. One morning Gar and I were listening to a Bible study on mercy. As it ended, Gar turned to me and asked, “What do you think is your best quality?” Raising my eyebrows, I asked, “Would judging be considered a quality?” I got no reaction so I shrugged and said, “I want to show mercy, but it’s hard with some people. You, on the other hand are good at it with everyone, even me.” He murmured that he usually tried. Thinking about it, I decided I needed to clarify, and defend myself, “Actually, I do show mercy to you.” He pursed his lips and tipped his head to the side, “Maybe we should google, ‘mercy.’”  

Then again, maybe I won’t work harder at being a better spouse. We boarded a plane, found our seats and sat down. As I pulled my left seat belt strap, Gar handed me my right one and said, “I already extended it.” The “late” Gar Eiden wasn’t always as helpful in words as in thought.  

Before storing our RV in Texas last spring, I noticed the bays were full of assorted paraphernalia. Gar said he thought he’d store his fishing gear on the floor of the living area. I felt this was ridiculous so I cleaned under the bed, fitting several poles, buckets, bubbler, bins, tackle boxes and the hoop net. Finishing, I asked him to look inside. He bobbed his head and approvingly said, “Oh ya, OK.” I admonished, “OK? How about, ‘My wife is amazing.’ Why do I always have to tell me how great I am?” Looking serious he said, “Because you’re so good at it, and if you and I both told you, you’d get just plumb tired of hearing it.” Sighing, I picked up the crawdad trap, and asked Gar what I was supposed to do with it? He answered, “Put it in the truck.” Frowning, I inquired “Are you taking this home?” He nodded. I said, “Wait, is this the one you had at home last summer and never used?” Again, he nodded. I said, “You realize I’m making a point.” He sighed, “Gee, thanks for the many points you’ve made through the years.” Unsmiling, I responded “Uh huh, and I’m right about you not using the trap, which is another point.” I was almost to the truck when I heard Gar announce, “Glad you always feel the need to drag me into your marital problems.”