Trena Eiden

Men, you need to realize how precious you are.

It doesn’t matter that the media says you aren’t as great as you truly are. Let me assure you, the media’s opinion doesn’t count since they would have you shaving your body, getting a pedicure and manicure and sporting a man bun while bringing cucumber slices to a picnic.

Honestly, women want a man’s man, so trim your nails with clippers that cost $1.59 and keep those locks and beard trimmed. You don’t have to be anybody but you as long as you’re being the best you — the man the Lord made, the protector and lover of his family. 

The Oxford dictionary defines “motor” as a machine that supplies power and defines “engine” as a machine with moving parts that converts power into motion. In recent years, evolution scientists have been stumped by the knowledge that we have machines in each of our trillions of cells. In fact, there are more motors in the end of just one of our fingers, than there are gasoline engines and electric motors in the entire world. Each motor is so incredibly small that it can’t be seen with a regular microscope, but if one part of the motor was eliminated, none of the engine would work.

We’re pretty spectacular, but men, as great as you might be, you’re probably not as rugged as you’d like to think you are. I recently read, “Everybody’s a tough guy till they have to use a screwdriver overhead for two minutes.” And you gentlemen had better strive to be your best because you are oftentimes annoying as heck.

I was talking with a friend one day and we were discussing the differences between men and women. I said, “When women are sick, they continue working, taking care of the children and fixing meals.” She broke in, “Oh yeah, and when men get the same illness, they whisper from the couch, ‘I wonder if the mortician works on weekends.’”

Thankfully, most of you have a great sense of humor, because that makes the difference between an OK guy and a great guy. Recently I went for a walk and when I got back, Gar was kneeling beside and slightly under the camper. I asked what he was doing and he murmured, “I was dreaming I was in heaven, but no, I’m under this camper holding a sewer fitting, with ‘stuff’ running down my elbow.”

A few days ago, when the alarm went off, Gar said it woke him from a dream that we were at the airport. He was dragging our suitcases inside, while I got our tickets. Then I disappeared, and since I had his ticket, he searched and searched for me. Getting out of bed, he said, “Next time, I’ll get the tickets.”

Most men are much quieter than their gals, and Gar is definitely the man who doesn’t feel the need to pollute the air with an abundance of words. A while back, we were driving and listening to the radio. There was a woman speaking about love, saying, “When a woman meets a guy and thinks he might be the one, she thinks about him all the time and pines for him. She stresses over him and her heart aches to be near him. She has him on her mind every moment and finds it hard to sleep and will even dream about him. She can’t concentrate on anything else but him and as she falls madly in love, she wants to spend every waking moment with him.”

As she continued on and on, I turned to Gar and asked, “Do guys feel like this?” My underachiever in verbiage answered, “Sure.” 

Women need a sense of humor too, and most of us love to prank our men. A daughter said her mother had a wonderful funny bone, and knowing she was dying, asked her husband to keep watering the plants in the bathroom, which he faithfully did. Only years later, when he moved to a new place, did he realize they were plastic. 

Be prepared, dads — children are jokesters too. Our son, who is a chemical engineer, was gone when a repairman came to fix the air conditioner. The man asked our 6-year-old grandson if his dad was at work. Much to his mother’s shock, the little fibber joked, “I have two dads and both are working; one’s at the plant, but the best one is at the firehouse.”

Hang in there dads. We love you.