Keyword: Remember Your Roots and Keep Them Colored

Things I never want to do again

There’s a long list of things I never want to do again and having hemorrhoid surgery is front and center. In case you’ve ever contemplated having a hemorrhoidectomy, don’t. You …

Motherhood isn’t as easy as we make it look

I’m here to give mothers hope. Your whining brood will grow up and though that’s bittersweet, just know they’ll still happily blame you for everything crummy that ever happened in …

What couples should know

I recently read an article informing young couples about what they should know pertaining to marriage. The very first sentence was somewhat intriguing: “Resolve every disagreement before going …

We should probably live before we die

In our Wyoming home, we’ve never had television per se, only a TV for Netflix and Hulu since we don’t have cable. On our first winter jaunt to the south, Gar wanted to purchase a flat …

In case you hadn’t noticed, we live in a crazy world

There are 7 billion people on the planet, but only 2.5 billion have access to a toilet. Apparently, they do have access to toilet paper and use it at the rate of 34 million rolls a day. Now, of the 7 …

When looking at the past, don’t stare

Scientists were amazed to find that, without a brain, the single-celled slime mold Physarum polycephalum has a memory when it comes to where food is located. I didn’t find this all that …

Life ain’t always fun

Gar had bundled parcels all week to go south to escape winter. When Samaritan’s Purse called to tell him to pack for work in Kentucky, he had to uncrate and repack because Kentucky gets snow …

Can dumb me get dumber?

A couple years ago, Samaritan’s Purse was hiring for DART (Disaster Assistance Response Team). Gar applied but COVID happened and everything was shuttered. Last February, they contacted Gar, …

Your spouse is worth a pot of gold

Gar and I recently celebrated our 42nd anniversary. Imagine waking up to my sticky-up hair for 15,000 gut-wrenching mornings. The man has a strong stomach. I have been known to get on his last …

Whether in my belly or in conversations, I like food

I’m devoted to food and completely loyal to it. I’m trustworthy and dedicated and food knows it can count on me to be committed with true faithfulness. I’m essentially a basset …

Our body has a wired weight

I recently read an article stating, “Don’t scold yourself for gaining weight — your body is wired to return to a natural set point.” I had a set point once, and I’m …

Who doesn’t love Thanksgiving?

Show me someone who doesn’t love Thanksgiving and I’ll show you a sad, skinny, salad-eating scallywag, who’s no fun to be around, and worse, probably ran in the 5k turkey trot. Who …

Furniture was never meant to last

When we met, Gar was a bachelor with an eclectic assortment of furniture and decorations that I was fairly certain we needed to burn. The couch was gold corduroy and I might have been able to live …

Fear not: Your children will always need you

Now’s the time when parents are smiling through their tears, bravely dropping first-time college students off — and those moms and dads are so distraught, wondering if they’re going …

I’m understanding a few things better

I’m understanding a few things better as time goes by. It takes longer for me because I’m a little hardheaded. If we surveyed my kids, they’d say, “A little?!” …

Relationships are hard

Gar and I are still married after 42 years — even after spending two winters in a 30-foot camper. I’m guessing the only thing that keeps us from murdering each other is neither one wants …

Parents are never done helping kids

As I reflect on the 4-H pledge — “I pledge … my head to clearer thinking, my heart to greater loyalty, my hands to larger service and my health to better living for my club, my …

Bears and I have a lot in common

Bears are not my favorite animal — in fact, I really dislike bears — but I’ll admit we have a lot in common. Bears’ midsections are round and mine is too. Bears have …

It’s a Christmas letter in July

In case you hadn’t noticed, every year the Eiden’s Christmas letter gets later and later, until this year, it’s an epistle for Christmas in July. Lucky you.  If you give it …

Highway patrolman problems

It was a Monday morning so I naturally didn’t have a joyful spirit — similar to how I am on all the other days of the week. As if getting out the door wasn’t awful enough, as I …
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