So what did you do on your summer vacation? I watched TV and worried. Not very impressive, but as you’ll see later, there were other factors at play besides my innate slothfulness since childhood, which if my Dad were still alive, he would vigorously vouch for.

But I’m also naturally inclined to sports and exercise.

I had vowed to end my golf and tennis sabbaticals, but played neither. Besides an inordinate amount of TV, I read my newspapers, usually beginning with my favorite part — after the Pittsburgh Pirates’ box score — the comics/puzzles page.

I digest the “funnies” and breeze through the  Jumble, then flip over to the “Help for the troubled” articles.

There’s Dear Abby (she recommends therapy), Hints from Heloise (she recommends vinegar), and “Ask Dr. K.” A recent question was “Is watching TV worse for my health than any other sedentary activity?” A good question indeed.

In between TV glances, I read Dr. K’s answer and these excerpts: “… but does it make sense that watching TV is worse than any other inactive activities? Actually it may.” He quoted some Harvard professor, whose “… recent study showed that watching a lot of TV is unhealthier than other activities that involve long periods of sitting.”

That is NOT what I wanted to hear. I anxiously shifted couch positions when I read, “People who watched three or more hours of TV each day (Amateurs! I have three hours in before lunch!) had twice the risk of death as those watching less than an hour. Those spending the most sitting time driving or using a computer did not have higher risks of death …”

But a Dr. K caveat cheered me slightly: “The study only showed a link between TV and early death, but wasn’t designed to prove watching TV actually caused the higher risk.”

Exactly! I need much more evidence to get me off the couch. Also, he adds, TV addicts might have other factors contributing to their poor health, such as using TV as an escape from extreme stress and anxiety, or being exhausted insomniacs, TV might be their only option.

“And what were the people eating while watching TV? Three or more hours of eating lots of cheese and nachos isn’t great for your health, regardless of what you’re doing while you eat.” Right on, Doc!

Dr. K concluded, “There’s no doubt that substituting physical activity for ‘empty TV’ (like certain foods full of empty calories, there are certain empty TV shows), would be healthier, but I’m just not convinced watching TV is in itself hazardous to health.”

Glad to hear that, yet I’m not convinced my sedentary TV-addiction isn’t killing me either. But as he said, I had other factors (un)motivating me.

In May, I once again fell into a depression — this one more profound than previous ones. I’m never depressed about my circumstances or what I do or don’t have.  It’s gotta be just a chemical thing since it arrives suddenly and without warning, and eventually lifts in the same manner.

And with depression — thus sedentary isolation — other health-harmful habits factors join in. Gone are the days of fiber-rich oatmeal breakfasts and apples for snacks, replaced by nutrition-deprived frozen dinners (although I defy any chef to bake a finer lasagna than my main gal, Marie Callender) and pizza.

Cooking feels like an overwhelming chore, so the broiled chicken and fish I once ate regularly now rarely grace my table.  

Since I rarely venture out to work when depressed, my already-irregular sleeping hours shift forward about four hours … sort of a daylight savings time reversed; I often hear my neighbor’s truck starting about the time I’m turning out my lamp light. Studies suggest one’s faith plays a large role in well-being.

But when one is depressed — when faith is most needed — is when faith is hardest to capture. You may have noticed my column missing from this page for months — another casualty of my poisoned brain.

The news of “always happy; forever ‘on’” Robin Williams’ suicide shook me, but not in an “I’ll never understand it” way like most others. I know what he knew — that depression devours everything in its path, especially humor and joy.

I wish he could have held on though, because when that magical day comes when it suddenly lifts — like mine did last month — everything looks opposite. Bleakness becomes hope; tragic becomes comical; darkness turns into dazzling bright.

I’m sure grateful to be ME again, but the fear of the darkness returning at some point always simmers underneath. But right now, I think I’ll broil some salmon and find out if Olive Glenn Golf Course is still open. I’m thinking I could drive that ball 400 yards!